Good Day all, this Monday was a doozie, had to deal with some customers and pay some bills left home half 9 reached back at 1:15pm. Was exhausting to say the least but I had my audio book playing which help me pass the time easily, the audio book was give and take by Adam Grant who I did a podcast analysis on. He gives examples of why givers are the most prone to being cheated or taken advantage of but on the other hand the best to receiving the most reward in the end. I kept that in mind because I’m a giver, maybe not an expert at it but I take the time help where I can despite being in the know that it wont be reciprocated. So I decided to look for a podcast on the lines of being a giver and I found one that does it justice or so it seems by the title What ‘Pickup’ Skills Teach About Giving Value. The guys being interview are very familiar to me as they have a YouTube channel named SimplePickup as well as a website and also a project named projectGo. Project Go is what is most enticing because it’s there as a way to help other guys learn the techniques that Kong, Jesse and Jason portrait in their simple pick up videos. So lets see what they can provide in the realm of advice in this podcast.
Here is a link to the podcast -http://theartofcharm.com/simple+pickup+podcast+jesse+kong
- What is simple pickup – 2:14
- (5:11) How is what they do different?
- Kissing Controversy – 12:05
- Give value and without concern of receiving any back – 10:16
- Kissing Controversy – 12:05
(13:21) The intern who went awry.
(15:51)The Julien Blanc Scandal
- Further explanation on what is their goal in all of this by Jesse – 19:30
- Kong’s words of encouragement – 21:48
(22:42) Jesse’s story of social anxiety.
(23:40) These things didn’t happen overnight.
- Since they have been doing this (which is 4 years) have they had any
- steady relationships – 26:48
- Start talking to people – 36:51
- Surrounding yourself with people better than you – 41:35
- Little prep talks – 42:46
(45:00) Positive reinforcement
- Reframing your life as being fun and more on giving value – 46:55
(47:19) Giving Value in terms of interviews
Key Points Taken
What is simple pickup – 2:14
There main purpose of the youtube and site is to show how anyone can pickup women, they do it in different settings and outlandish outfits.
(5:11) How is what they do different? First they are not pick up artist and one of their biggest mantras is not be a douche bag. They try their best to be normal or as they say a little below average looking guys that are not your typical race (Kong is asian and Jesse is indian) and show you can still get women. Putting your ego away and being yourself which is still something unique to bring to the table because there is only one you.
Give value and without concern of receiving any back – 10:16
You must give value without ever thinking that you are owed it in return, eventually it always comes around. In terms of picking up women just because you had the balls to talk to her doesnt mean she inevitbly owes you vagina.
Kissing Controversy – 12:05
Simple Pickup was caught up in a bit of hot water when men who claim to have learnt from them were attempting to kiss random women in public. Here is the video. They dont care cause they welcome the publicity it brings to their site, it gives them more potential customers.
(13:21) The intern who went awry. When the news came out about the incident Jesse confronted the intern and he said the girl didnt like that he used lines on her that were used on the simple pick up videos. He also showed Jesse the text messages where they were flirting back and forth and organzing for a date. But the texts actually stopped abruptly because she found out that he was involved with simple pick up. Apparently she was pissed and spread rumors that guys were kissing women without consent on the bolevard through a blog. (I cant say who is right because it seems a bit extreme to reach the news.)
(15:51) The Julien Blanc Scandal.
Julien Blanc was a prominent figure in the field of pickup artistry, but has been in some hot water recently where his methods are concerned as well on his remarks on picking up women. The guys say they felt it right to post something up on the issue so that it doesnt harm their brand.
Further explanation on what is their goal in all of this by Jesse – 19:30
Jesse thinks that there is a lack of action on the part of men when the opportunity to talk to a woman is available. He just wants to help them take that first step and sort of a have an idea on knowing what to do. Kong goes further to say there is a bigger picture, they also show how to manage your time more productively, how to network and how to be more creative. Its getting the skills you need that can universally be helpful in life.
Kong’s words of encouragement – 21:48
He went for years getting rejected, friendzoned and thinking that women never liked him. Those constant reminders put him in a mindset that he couldnt get girls. Sometimes you need an external source to push you toward a certain direction to make that change yourself. They want to be the force to pivot you two or three degrees so that 10 years from now you would be on a more positive path to a better life.
(22:42) Jesse’s story of social anxiety. When he was younger he was very depressed person to the point where he wanted to commit suicide. He took medication went to doctors and none of these things helped, he couldnt figure out what was causing him to feel this way. Until one day he decided to start actively putting himself out there to improve his own life.
He made youtube vid on it
(23:40) These things didnt happen overnight. It took time actually going in public and talking to women for a year and more. Jesse could not for a whole year compliment women, had a time where he was in a grocery and couldnt even answer the cashier if he wanted paper or plastic.
Since they have been doing this (which is 4 years) have they had any steady relationships – 26:48
Kong says on and off and Jesse says he is trying to have as many open relationships as possible, but they are trying to grow a business and that is their main focus for now.
Start talking to people – 36:51
After watching one of their videos, it maybe inspiring but still some people need to some motivation beyond seeing it and here is where Kong’s advice plays a role. He says a great baby step is just talking to the people that are immediately around you, it will help with your social skills. Then you can move outward into the world for example if you go for coffee and when you are being servedy ask the barista how her day is going or ask her to recommend something on the menu which can build into something else.
Surrounding yourself with people better than you – 41:35
To grow the fastest, work with people who are better than you at something and then they show you how to do it which accelerates the learning rather than having to struggle on your own.
Little prep talks – 42:46
To get their selves ready for filming one of their videos they talk to people about random things just to get the social oil running. Moving your mind from being in a high pressure zone by doing low pressure things, for example as was said before, talk to people along the way just to get your axiety levels to diminish. It may be hard to do initially, but practice.
(45:00) Positive reinforcement. A study had one group of people do positive body language like raise their hands in accomplishment etc and have the other group do nothing before doing a test. The ones who did the positive actions did better on the test. So you can trick your mind to do better. Also they told one group that the nervousness you feel is scientifically proven that it helps you to perform better and to remember that, which may or may not be entirely true but your mind will think it is.
Reframing your life as being fun and more on giving value – 46:55
Always go into situations (well not all of them) as being fun, try to open your self to experiences as being opportunity more than a burden.
(47:19) Giving Value in terms of interviews, its much more important to let people know how you can apply value to things or their life. Helping someone without looking like you want something in return will benefit you in the long run, people will always come to you for help because they can trust you. For example a girl who is now working for them came into their interview not just answering the questions ask but genuinely showed interest in improving the business by telling them the problems with their website as well as suggestions on changes. Another example was how they hired their channel manager was he just offered to work for free and showcased how good he was for the position and they offered him the job.
Not as much information as I thought on giving value, they touched on it twice at the beginning and the end. They talked about how their brand has been hit by controversy but also how they turned it around. Protecting their status as being a place for helping people pickup women after the Julien Blanc scandal. How an external source can always change your perspecitive and push you onto a new path for the better. Issues with anxiety and how small steps can slowly improve the situation, for example talking to people you know in your social circle then expanding outwards. For improving you and your business or even just for learning have people around you that are better at what you are trying to learn. Positive reinforcement and prep talks before doing something you fear. Reframing your life as something good to look forward to in all situations. Despite not being as good as my previous podcast analysis there is always something of benefit. Thanks for reading.